Sunday, November 1

to pair or not to pair?

my friend snapped this...i see me, shy, dazed, & confused that the world keeps going by... (this is not smizing, as tyra would say)  girly woman me as always,  but it's like there's this view i'm missing... and it's right there in front of me...

Anyway today my twitter question was-
never married, because i never wanted to divorce. are we meant to be together a lifetime? i don't know, so i'll just be here now.
i got differing responses, mostly not regarding my query, but rather focused on marriage & projection.

@aliyasking wrote-  RT @racheltrue never married, because i never want to divorce. [so don't audition bcuz you might not get the part? Or show might not last?]

 my reply to her-
@aliyasking you assume too much. i didn't say i don't love... i simply questioned life long marriage.

to question the institution of marriage, (a luxury everyone should have, regardless of orientation) isn't a denial of love. the two aren't mutually exclusive. i love ♥, marriage=tax break to me though, & so many different things to different people.

SO, do you think people are meant to pair up for life?
have you experienced truly happy couples of 10 or more years? are your parents still 'happily' married?
i know a few couples like that, as well as a few i don't socialize with anymore because the lack of having each others back was palpable.
i do think some are meant to find each other and take the journey together.. I'm a romantic American girl raised on promises and the Red, Blue and Violet fairy books... 
and i also believe some souls meetings are meant to be brief encounters... with lasting finger prints.

all hallows eve...rocking on w/ my Nov Scorpio self.

"You're a Scorpio Water Faery"
adorable undrunk boy said. "See me when you're grown" I said with a goodbye cheek kiss. him sweetly laughing, calling, "c'mon, let me give you my num... email...?" as I walked away.(i trust if we are meant to met up someday we will, and that's a bet)
how bloody great is that for any gal, btw nice to feel 'seen,' probably cause I was relaxed, and 'appreciated', probably cause i was 'mellow' me, not wound me. 
The reflection for me is-
A. how like totally fun it is to be flirty! (i know, duh) and um,
B. could learn to conquer nerves and finesse it when the stakes higher. When it's fairly innocent or 'practice flirting' I am, or can be..... lovely, smart, quick,concise, witty, (swear to god, you should see me, i'm very good at a party...) 
So the goal is to become... more and more comfortable in my own skin. May require a chrysalis mayhaps built for 2, or  simplyhanging upside down for a while in Dagoba swamps, to emerge a more present lady when the boy is an interesting/ interested present man. i see the work i can/have do on myself... and know it will take patience with myself & in the end probably a very specific kooky smooky cool dude who'll desire to share himself and delight in discovering layers of the true and truth.